People often ask me how am I able to do so much and never get tired? It’s not that I don’t get tired, I just know that there are some things I simply just want to do in my life and I have to make things happen.
All of my life I kept journals, I wrote things down, and would often revisit those list to see if I have been able to check things off of my list. I have a list of accomplishments from military service to achieving advanced degrees. All of this would not be possible if I had not set down and continuously updated my goals.
I have felt overwhelmed and paralyzed by fear so I realigned my goals? I took time to identify my strengths to take control of my life and push pass my fears?
I want to coach others to do the same and together we will do the work to help you recognize your self-worth, prioritize your goals, and speak life into your aspirations. It is important to LOVE yourself intensely, create opportunities for growth, and step into your purpose with authority.
Working with me will help you gain:
1. Clarity as you position yourself for greatness.
2. Love for yourself through affirmations.
3. Purpose as you set attainable goals.
4. Understanding as you reflect on your life.
5. Sense of self as you CELEBRATE you!
“Closer to Purpose Than You Think” is my 30 day self-paced success guide that will be available August 1, 2019. I cannot wait for you to unlock your magic.
Today I sat, I read, I prayed, and I listened to what my mind, body and spirit was gently preparing me for. Then in my subconsciousness my body felt the sudden urge to move. Not move outside of my house but move closer to my chromebook so that I could sit up and write.
It is a new month and I have yet to really type out my focus and present a new blog but I can say that my mind has been very busy with ideas, lists, goals, and timelines that I must crank something out today. Even though I successfully converted my Brown Sugar Magic book into a more focused Goal Setting and Success Coaching Guide that I want to convert into an email course or something… working on the logistics of that! I’m doing all of this by myself, so I’m taking my time!
However lately, I have been on a quiet journey of re-centering myself because I’ve needed divine intervention in my thought processes while ultimately working on me. Ironically light has transcended through me and I have been helping others not really thinking about it in that way. I only know I’ve been helping because of the messages and encouragement I have received. But in my readings today, two things stood out and they made my heart race just a little bit… have I been Believe in your worth.
Release any doubts of your value.Believe in your worth.
Release any doubts of your value.pouring into others when I felt empty? and, am I truly preparing myself for what I want?
I did a live video the other day on my LaTilya Rashon “tilyarealeyes”page and while I got feedback, I said to myself that I was just beginning to scratch the surface of the work that I am doing on myself. I’m going to do a follow-up to that video on my youtube channel soon but right now I’m just figuring some stuff out.
I KNOW a lot of people, but the reality is I call very few my friends because as the seasons change and we grow individually, we realize that everyone does not nourish your soul in the same way. We as people make mistakes in general and when we are working through those things, the last thing we want to feel is any type of memory that could reset your feelings towards those things. This may seem like a ramble…but it’s not! I’m just clearing the space in my head for the endured journey I am taking.
I wrote a while back about 3 Things I’m Completely Obsessing Over and Thing 3 was finding the BALANCE in my LIFE! I am still very much my hardest critic. As I examine my life, it is a canvas for others because I have a story to tell about how even when I block certain things out and jump over hurdles, I have NEVER just given up! I am a walking billboard for beating statistics…I can’t wait to get that story told.
In the months to come I am going to unveil my life in a series of lessons I’ve learned. It’s for my healing and for my growth. I did not get this far because I wasn’t focused. I got this far because I was driven… I would be remiss to not mention that two awesome friends Yolanda and Ashley have spoke into my life a shift in careers so I am embracing their genuine sincerity.
There’s plenty of work to do and in by doing the work on myself I hope my transparency continues to transcend. Some of the things to be tackled are:
Growing up as a only child.
My feelings towards my biological father.
My first attempt at college…The University of Florida (2000-2001)
I’m not empty, I’m just cautious. We can still pour into others without completely tapping out. I know and recognize my limitations as I work towards and prepare myself for the LIFE and LOVE I want. As I COACH myself, I hope you take away little nuggets along the way.
Isn’t ironic how on August 26, 2016 my thought process was I Don’t Want to Coach, I Just Want to Write but that was more so in the aspect of being a writing coach. But I’m exploring a different avenue…Life and Success Coaching because my purpose is bigger than I innately realized in the beginning. For faith is substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Research continues… Continue to follow my journey… Leave a nice comment or note and please share!
I am not perfect but I will use my voice to do what I do best…Teach Others How to Cope!
I would be remissed to say that the recent release of my second inspirational book, Brown Sugar Magic: Goal Setting and Reflections Journal has been met with lukewarm acceptance and I want to change that reception. Receiving the “likes” on my social media is okay, but in true entrepreneurial spirit I would like to see those “likes” convert to sales.
I have been dealing with so much lately over these past six months, between a divorce being finalized, regaining control of my finances now as single mom, and closing out a school year, I’m surprised I got this second book out, but it was something that I HAD to do.
Yesterday after feeling like I had hit a brick wall emotionally and feeling a twinge of being burned out I laid across my bed and began listening to a couple of podcasts by Cara Alwill Leyba. Her message is clear and distinct and it pushed me to look back at my “do what you love” notebook and really plan out my course of action for these next few months.
I have to remind myself that yes it has only been a year, and my need to be good at everything I do is taking over my thought processes and essentially making me overthink EVERYTHING in my life. I had taken to Facebook and joined all of these groups and I find that this blogging industry is SATURATED. Everybody is creating a lot of the same things and the competition is STEEP. Even though regionally everyone is spread out, and there are some small hubs of creators in the same area, I see why now more than ever I must stake my claim in this creative industry and CREATE MY VISION!
So I see for myself in my vision and my future:
BROWN SUGAR MAGIC
I want Brown Sugar Magic to be my main inspirational platform. Creating my vision started with setting some realistic and achievable goals for myself. Through planning a course of action to take and being unafraid to put my words on paper, self-publishing my first book was a personal goal that I accomplished. My education was not pursued haphazardly, I was deliberate and intentional as I attained higher degrees of education. I know what it’s like and even sometimes find it overwhelming to want to do one thing but then have to revamp that objective or goal to take care of smaller things first. God planned my path for me and he innately gave me the ability to aspire for great things and become successful in my own right.
If I can inspire someone to be SMART about their choices in life as they design their future, be in touch with their needs and take care of themselves before they have nothing to offer to the people around them; I take on the role. Additionally, I want to help African-American women and girls build themselves up to only rely on their independence to see them through life. That’s not to say that having help in life is not good, but this is to say be able to help yourself so that if you are ever in the position to have to do for yourself, YOU ARE NOT HELPLESS! As I walk in my purpose, my dream, and define my vision; I will celebrate my setbacks, imperfect moments, and my growth. I see this as a way to encourage many others.
SPEAKING AND HOSTING
All throughout school I was constantly reminded by my teachers about my continuous talking in class. I was a fast learner and completed my work often times ahead of my classmates so I was always looking for someone to talk to. It could have been the fact that I was an only child but that would be an excuse. I simply just love to talk. The cheerleader in me wants to be in the limelight spreading inspiration, joy, and motivation. I have a lot to say about coming from a SINGLE parent home and PERSERVERING through the STEREOTYPES that were placed on me. I have had to be disciplined, make tough decisions, and show my resiliency to get to this place in my 35 years of life. I say this time and time again, I DEFY stereotypes and my authentic rawness at times is just the dose of reality people need to know that LIFE
AIN’T FAIR! Put me on a stage…I will rock the party, keep you engaged, but most importantly MOTIVATE!
BOOKS AND BLOGGING
Ever since being told by a teacher my senior year in high school that “MY PEOPLE“ need me, I get tickled at the thought of her saying that often. I love books and have read what I like over the years and always knew that one day I would write a book of my own. My flagship book, My Fourth Year in Middle School: The Truth About Teaching chronicles my transition into what was spoke on to me at the age of 18. If my people need me, whether it be teachers, African-American women and girls, writers, or whomever feels inspired by my words, I’m glad to be of SERVICE. I have always wanted to write, and the urgency I feel to be great will take time, after all, I teach full-time and pursue my writing when I am not in the classroom. I blog as much as possible and I am continuing to find inspiration and write what I think people need to read from me. Writing what I consider to be my first epic blog, What No One Tells You About Blogging, was the tip of the iceberg. One day my persistence with pay off! I am establishing my voice. This creative journey is personal.
If an ebook, writer’s apparel and other products surface as I make my stamp then so be it. Anybody can make a t-shirt, cup, bag, and other doodads and it will sell, but I want to be as consistent with my message that I anticipate being with these other endeavors. The ones that are selling everything under the moon, make it look easy from books to lip gloss. However, I’m learning that when you have a concrete audience, it is doable to make those kinds of sales. Because I’m still new to this I will limit my conversation on that.
Brown Sugar Magic was simply birthed from the thought of me loving to write everything down so that I can see how far I have grown.
I received my first little brown diary with a gold padlock and accompanying key when I was six years old. I wrote the traditional, Dear Diary entries but I had no idea that being introduced to reflecting on my day at an early age would become something that I am passionate about now in my mid 30s. All throughout high school I kept journals and they are the back drop to personality, my emotions, my thoughts, and my drive. My love for journaling was actually interrupted when I was 20 years old because a boyfriend of mine read my journal and instantly found out that I was not the perfect girlfriend. Oddly, even though he entertained other girls at the start of that tumultuous relationship, he didn’t like knowing that I had befriended and entertained other guys as well.
My love for creating lists and reflecting on my day came back full force during my first marriage as I kept a 5 subject Mead notebook that I am sure will turn into a bestseller. I just need the time and energy to relive those emotional situations before I pour all of that drama into a book. Some day!
However, one good thing about that journal and other notebooks I have doodled in over the years, I find book ideas, random thoughts, and lists for things that I wanted to try to do. My notebooks and journals now look like bucket lists, accomplishments, and goals as I check things off.
So I was literally sitting on my bed one day and the idea of creating a goal setting book and journal popped into my head and I went to work. I am often asked, “How do you keep it all together?” My answer has become, “Because I write it down. I etch out almost every idea and thought in my mind and I go from there.” Ironically thought with the amount of things I have accomplished in my life, I still feel that I should be doing more.
My blogging and listing is at an all time high as I dig deep inside of myself each day to press out more encouragement, motivation, and thoughts to share. So Brown Sugar Magic is a journey of self-realization and I pray will be a source of motivation for my Brown Sugar Sisters that need that extra push to re-prioritize their lives and design the life they want to live.
We all have a little bit of magic inside of us, and I want to help ladies find their spark, set some attainable goals for themselves and begin to understand their worth. Sometimes we get thrown off course and need to redirect our lives so Brown Sugar Magic is that guide to better goal setting and reflecting on your growth.
Brown Sugar Magic is a 52 week affirmation, goal setting and reflections journal. In this four part book there is definitely a theme per section and it is written in mind to help women grow beyond their comfort zone and gain a new lease on life.
Stepping into Brown Sugar Magic I help you discover your magic as you set S.M.A.R.T. goals for yourself. I help you measure your time and attainable objectives that you work over time to accomplish. We all need a little guidance to get on the right track, so this books help you reclaim your life and work towards your short term objectives until you reach you intended goal. Once your begin to check things off of your list that you want to attain, you will gain a sense of pride about yourself realizing that YOU are your biggest asset. Part 1 breaks down what a S.M.A.R.T. goal is while simultaneously requiring a weekly affirmation, reflection, or celebration message to yourself.
As you progress to part two of this book, you will address your needs. You quickly realize that whatever you feed your body, also fuels your mind. Your spirit is your internal guiding light and whatever you feed your spirit, it becomes your mindset. You have to be in touch with your sense of belonging and have self esteem to keep yourself lifted through trying times in your life. Once you begin to identify your needs, you become more careful where you place your energy. You cannot be all things to all people if you do not meet the needs of self first.
We all have a particular skill set that propels our productivity. However, our coping mechanisms are not all the same. I have relied a lot on the skills my mom taught to pull me through tough times and I take the liberty to share these ideas with you in Brown Sugar Magic. Establishing your independence is difficulty if you have never had to face adult challenges once you grow past being a child in your parents’ home. We all stumble at some point in our lives, but it ‘s just a matter of how your pick yourself up. Self love is the best love. Once you have made it to this part of the book, you are still affirm-reflecting-and celebrating your growth. At this stage in the game I am sure your goals have changed and you have outline specific things to work toward and see yourself realistically accomplishing your goals.
The purpose of Brown Sugar Magic in to help you live your best life and reaffirm your happiness. Since sugar is in it’s purest state when it is brown, I help you unleash your magic. Part three walks you through the three steps to a better life as you reassess yourself and identify your true strengths, weaknesses, opportunities for growth, and threats to your overall productivity. The risks you take on this journey of self-discovery will have its ups and its downs but pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone and experiencing growth is the ultimate reward.
Take this journey to unleash your magic, prioritize your life, and trust the process. I challenge all of my Brown Sugar Sisters to take back their control and live the life they have dreamed of living.
They say that you should smile at the people around you because you never know what somebody is going through. But when you can’t smile at people I say you should be a beacon of light that shines so bright that your positivity and inspiration speaks before you say a word.
I have been asked how I keep a smile on my face while dealing with the struggle, and I say it is because I know my worth. I was specifically asked how I am so happy while my life is in transition. My answer in short has been that I have to remember who I am, remember that my sons need a WHOLE mother, and I must place value in myself.
People that walk around “Happy” all of the time are living in a false reality, because hardships are a part of living and we all go through the struggle from time to time. However, we have to not remain stagnant in that struggle. We must deal with REAL life and move forward, but most importantly LEARN.
Taken from my post on Facebook a short list was born…in order to live my life more abundantly and Not Dwell in the Past…Sometimes you just have to speak things into the atmosphere, enjoy life to the fullest, and create the life I want to life.
Step one of my process is gaining a new lease on life. I had to realize that losing people in my life was not always a bad thing. Some losses are out of my individual control. Death is inevitable…but a breakup be it a long term relationship or marriage is NOT the end of the world. It may feel like the end of the world when you lose someone you love, but there is a blessing in losing someone that didn’t value your presence in the first place. Eventually you get tired of feeling unappreciated and realize that you deserve better. You will cry, flip out, reflect, question, scream, not understand, and then realize that it is time to LET IT GO! You can try to hold on, but if the relationship was meant to last it would. Sometimes letting go is hard to do but in order to have peace of mind it is necessary. No one person is perfect in a relationship, but when you know that YOU have done all that you can, make peace with your circumstances and know that YOU DESERVE BETTER.
Step two is to challenge myself and step out of my comfort zone. I am VERY black and white when it comes to rules because I have too much to lose. That does not mean I am perfect, don’t get upset and am not confrontational. It just means it takes a lot to get me to that point. Everything does not need a reaction, but when I do REACT be ready because it’s not going to be how you would expect. I’m very comfortable in my skin, so now that I am deciding to sit in front of the camera I am setting myself up for criticism from others. I am already hard on myself when it comes to my writing, so in order to grow I have to throw myself out there even more. Whether it’s writing academic content, working on my upcoming projects, or making VLOGS in order to get better I must first not rely on being comfortable. So PUSH yourself to do things differently and enjoy learning more about who you are and what makes you tick.
Step three is having fun while I fumble through my new experiences. Whether it’s a dinner date, movies, throwing back a few cocktails, or getting some new ink (I LOVE TATTOOS), there is NOTHING to STOP me from having fun. After being thrown completely for a loop, and having my world shaken up I have rebounded and know that I will LIVE my LIFE ABUNDANTLY WELL. My sons are growing and maturing into awesome little men. They are well taken care of and are happy to see their mom living a little rather being bogged down by sleepless nights and endless tears. I am deserving of a stress free life… I am not afraid to give love another shot. I removed toxic people from my life and while others want to assume, they have no idea just how GOOD my life really truly is. I have spent so much time taking caring of others, it feels good to have a friend in my life that makes things a little easier for me. I am able to relax. So I say to my followers and encouragers, OPEN UP an LIVE A LITTLE! Try NEW things…Don’t be so Quick to say NO!
Make a list, check it twice. Life is better with lists! Come back for more in the list series.